I had to look up my doctor’s name to get a prescription filled yesterday so I went to my local clinic’s webpage to find a list of doctors. I got a hilarious surprise when I discovered that the webpage had been recently updated.
Anytime I have to go to this place it’s crawling with infected zombie patients and irritated doctors who seem like they would enjoy their job a lot better if it weren’t for all the sick people.
Let’s take the opening photo on the website. I’m guessing this is a picture of the waiting room.
First of all, this is NOT the waiting room at our local clinic. How do I know this? Because the waiting room at our clinic has NO WINDOWS!
Also, who are these bright, healthy-looking women? And one of them is smiling! This is not anywhere near the type of people I see when I go to the waiting room. They look more like this:
And then when I click on the page describing doctors, I’m met with this, which I assume is a stock photo as I don’t remember ever seeing any of these (happy?) faces around our clinic:
Who are these fresh-faced, energetic, clean-cut doctors? They certainly aren’t the people who work at our clinic. They look more like this:
But thanks anyway, local clinic website, for giving me a laugh this morning. Maybe next time I’m feeling sick, I’ll just look at these ridiculous photos instead of submitting myself to the depressing, infection-filled cesspool of irritated doctors down at the clinic. Half the time, it might even be more effective.
My youngest son got a tick in his head this weekend. It was removed by a camp doctor but unfortunately, the head broke off and is stuck. So my son has a tick head in his own head.
He said, “It’s a good thing it’s not like that cartoon I watched where these creatures enter your head and take over your brain.”
“Yeah, I’m glad you’re not controlled by some evil creature,” I replied.
He looked up at me with a creepy smile and said, “Or am I?”
So he’s taking this quite well.
Anyway, the school nurse also tried to get it out with no luck and recommended we visit the “närakuten” which is like a mild form of emergency room. It’s not like a ‘your leg is falling off’ emergency room, but more like a ‘you got the flu after 3pm and couldn’t make a normal doctor appointment’ kind of emergency room.
After a 30 minute wait for our number, we were foiled by the evil receptionist. When I told her my son had a tick head that broke off and we needed it removed, she snapped, “Just go home and do it yourself!”
Gee, it never occured to me to simply not subject myself to 30 minutes in a disease filled waiting room and just do it myself!
I told her that both a camp doctor and a school nurse had advised us to go to the doctor. She said, “Ugh, fine let me see it.” My son showed her. “Nope. Just go home and figure it out. NEXT!”
I tried to explain what happened to my husband, but felt I wasn’t getting the story across properly, so I was inspired to illustrate our experience. I think I captured it pretty accurately. What do you think?
Went to the doctor yesterday to have a mole checked out. The entire appointment took 1 minute.
“Looks fine. Come back if it gets darker. Bye.”
200 kr (30 dollars). I told my husband that at least in the U.S. I would have gotten a lecture for 10 minutes on proper sun protection just so I felt better about my money.
And to think, I took a shower for that.
Leo has the chicken pox this week. At the moment it is my turn to be home with him a couple of days. Lucky for me, this is also the same time that the temperatures dropped between -15 c and -20c. Leo and I sit at the window, drinking hot chocolate and waving at all the shivering people. A perfect winter’s day.
On a side note, Leo does not appreciate my chicken jokes. He got a bit upset when I asked if there were eggs in his bed and also when I said that I thought I saw feathers growing on him. Max should be catching this in the next week or so. I bet I can get him to cluck. Sickness is only fun if you can entertain with it.
Don’t you hate it when you’re in the waiting room for the doctor and the only thing to look at is the giant poster on the wall that says, “Let me tell you about cholera….”?