My youngest son made a cape for his brother. When his brother tried it on, it was so tight around the neck that it choked him a bit. When he asked if they could cut or loosen it, the youngest son said:
“Well, you have to take risks when it comes to fashion.”
As I was pulling on my American flag underwear this morning, I started to think about how strange it is that people get so upset about “desecrating the flag” while at the same time, they buy American flag underwear.
I also started to wonder if the U.S. was the only country who did this, but quickly realize that quite a few of them do. Now the question becomes, what country DOESN’T turn it’s flag into underwear? Also, wouldn’t wars end faster if they just sent out good-looking people in the underwear of that country’s flag? Everyone would be distracted. Or better yet, everyone has to fight in flag underwear.
An advantage to shopping in Sweden – you can wander around alone in a store all day and not one salesperson will bother you. If you need help, they are pretty easy to find, but they are polite enough not to interrupt your browsing.
Whenever we go back to the states, it throws me off to have people constantly approach me while I shop. “Do you need anything?” NO. “Have you heard about our special offers?” DON’T CARE. “Has anyone else been helping you today?” LEAVE ME ALONE I JUST WANT A PENCIL.
And I can’t get over how everyone gives out all of their information to the sales people. Here’s how buying a shirt goes in Sweden:
I put the shirt on the counter. The clerk rings it up and tells me the price. I pay. The clerk says, “Thanks.”
Here’s how buying a shirt goes in America:
I attempt to put the shirt on the counter but it’s covered in all sorts of extra tiny knick-knacks they are trying to get me to impulse buy. The clerk says, “Oh, that’s a nice color. Did you know we also have that in red?”Me: DON’T NEED RED. JUST WANT THIS ONE.
Clerk : But if you get 2, you can get a 10 percent discount.
Me: DON’T NEED TWO.
Clerk: Do you have our club card?
ME: NO, ONLY SHOP HERE ONCE A YEAR.
Clerk: That’ll be 25 dollars. Can I have your phone number please?
ME: ARE YOU TRYING TO ASK ME OUT?
Clerk: It’s just so we know what area our shoppers are from.
ME: WHY DON’T YOU JUST ASK ME WHERE I’M FROM.
Clerk: Well can I have your email address for extra coupons?
ME: NO, I DON’T LIVE HERE, I DON’T WANT COUPONS.
Clerk: How about your zip code?
ME: I THINK YOU’RE TRYING TO STALK ME. YOU’RE MAKING ME NERVOUS. I JUST WANTED A SHIRT. ALL I WANTED WAS A SHIRT! AHHHHHH!!!!!!!
And that’s a typical shopping experience for me when I travel in the states.
Americans, please quit giving out your phone number and email address. You don’t have to do this. Plus, I’m really tempted to call or email one of you after you loudly announce this personal information all over the store. From me, you’ll get an annoying warning not to do that again. But that guy in the Hello Kitty sandals and the trenchcoat hanging out over there by ladies lingerie might not be so pleasant when he calls you on the phone.
Listening to Dexy’s Midnight Runners this morning. When is the adult blue-Jean overall coming back into fashion? It was actually popular in the mid-eighties. I owned a pair.
Legwamers have come back, leggings, some people are trying to bring shoulder-pads back, but why not blue-Jean overalls? If I remember correctly I wore mine with a pink bandana tied around the waist. Very classy.
I was in a meeting today with an old man in a suit. He would have looked very sophisticated except for the wild white hair going in all different directions all over his head.
I’ve decided I really like this look. It’s the “charming old man genius” look. Is there a fashion magazine for people over 80? This look should be number one with the old men. I’m going to convince Måns to look like this when he turns 80.
So I go to put a Kleenex in the pocket of my new pants today only to realize that my pants are full of fake pockets!!!! There wasn’t one real pocket on there. I almost ripped the stitching out trying to get one to open. Luckily I had my boots on so I stuffed the Kleenex in there. Anyway, that’s what I get for buying pants on sale.