Am I too cynical or is it just impossible to take certain companies seriously when going through job application ads?
We’re on a mission to take over the world, and we believe that the only way to succeed with that is by having the Hungriest Digital Tigers and Toughest Tech Lions available.
(Well, I’m a Cantakerous Copywriting Camel, so I guess I’m out.)
What Google created in 10 years, we will be creating in 6 months.
(I’d put my money on this company being bankrupt in 6 months.)
Just send your email to our Chief People Officer…
(Is this an actual job title? Is anyone questioning how ridiculous this sounds? ” Hello, Chief People Officer, I am the Overlord Writing Governor.”)
Just out of curiosity, I thought I would apply because:
- Aside from the lion and tiger thing, I had all the qualifications
- If this is their ad, what kind of stories will I come away with after an interview?”
So I went to their page and it turns out, applicants are required to apply word by word as the questions show up. Starting with:
We are looking for a Digital Copywriter. Press YES
(Ok, that answer doesn’t match the question, unless I’m agreeing that YES, you ARE looking for a digital copywriter.)
Then I get to read the ad again and am instructed to press CONTINUE
What is your first name? _________ PRESS OK.
Now, I can probably guess the next question, but I went ahead and exited the site instead.
If you live in Stockholm and are a passionate cyclist…
This is an ideal role to gain experience in the ….
So little or no pay. NOPE. Next.
These job ads get more specific every day. Today’s copywriting ad states that they would prefer an applicant who is really into chainsaws.
If I come dressed as this guy, do you think I’ll get the job?
Sweden is great because sometimes you can get 50% jobs as well as 75% jobs. It works out well especially if you have kids to pick up from daycare or take to activities.
I think this one is going a bit too far though.
87.5% – What kind of random strange percentage is this? Not 88! Not 90! We have calculated it to the very minute and you better not work one minute more!
Today’s job ad:
“Dancer for ‘Sinbad in the Year 2050.”
These are the jobs that I find online. Now, believe me, I’d love to be a dancer for Sinbad in the Year 2050. The ad says it’s “oriental/futuristic dance.” Well of course it is! What else would it be for Sinbad 2050?
I’d totally apply of course, but it’s in a town 5 hours away. Oh well.
(Maybe I should travel down to see this show. Sounds great!)