Tag Archives: phone

Cause it just feels wrong to throw them out?

I saw this article, at first thinking it was about my husband, but then realizing they said ‘phones’ and not ‘cords’.

However, we actually do have about 11 old mobile phones sitting in a box. I keep thinking we should make an art project out of them. I had them all in a glass vase for a while. The kids’ friends really enjoyed that. Apparently having an original iPhone is cool.

But now I don’t know what to do with them. Most are too old to be used. Ideas? Phone museum?

Indestructible

My husband started the morning by showing our young boys the indestructible power of an old Commodore 64 joystick. Now, I could write about how we are low on money and I eat mostly crackers at the end of the month just to save while apparently my husband NEEDS to buy two old Commodore joysticks for the Commodore that collects dust on our shelf and is never played…

But that’s not what this is about.

No, this post is about the dangers of letting young boys know that something has been labeled ‘indestructible.’ This word doesn’t exist in a young person’s vocabulary. Instead, it is automatically processed as a challenge. I have a feeling that even though these joysticks aren’t hooked up, they won’t last long.

My son likes to tell the story of a friend who claimed his new phone case protected his phone so that the screen would never break, and then demonstrated this by throwing his phone directly on the edge of a piece of concrete where it of course the screen was completely crushed.

I think this destructive habit never really goes away in boys or men. It’s the reason fireworks sales are huge.

Once at the optometrist, a man in front of me complained to the receptionist that he was not happy with his ‘indestructible’ glasses. He said, ‘I throwed ’em on the floor, stomped on ’em with my boots and the lenses got all scratched up!’

Again, it’s not a selling point, it’s a challenge. A challenge that should be reserved for water balloons or pie. Cause at least that would make me laugh.

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Everything was better in the …

… insert decade here.

I’m sure you’ve gotten one of these emails before, or seen a post on Facebook about how much better it was in the 1950s.

“We didn’t have to wear seatbelts!”  “Our kids could run and play in the neighborhood all day!” “Families ate dinner together!” “Kids listened to their parents!”

Besides the idiotic ‘no seatbelt’ thing, our family has all of these today, so anyone longing for this time should focus more on their own behavior rather than a particular decade.

And of course those emails never mention the horrible racial discrimination, the Cold War, polio, … the list goes on and on. But that’s not the point I’m trying to make today.

Today, I was thinking of what people might say to each other in a few more years when their memories fade and perhaps “The 80s” will be the golden decade.

The reason I started thinking about this is because this morning, I asked a friend of mine how she was doing and she replied, “I dropped my phone in the toilet.”

And that’s where the argument for the 80s starts to take shape. No one dropped their phone in the toilet in the 80s. Most people didn’t have a mobile phone and if they did, tit was too big to fit in the toilet.

Let’s see, what else could they say to glorify the 80s?

  • Our phones were shaped like Snoopy and Garfield.
  • Lots of arcades and pinball machines.
  • When you popped in a video game to your console, it started immediately. We didn’t have to wait for updates.

I’m afraid I’m stuck now, but you get the idea. However, if they really get those pizza delievery drones to work, I don’t think anyone will be arguing that the past was ever better than the present.

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A 10 year old with a phone

Now that my son has to travel on his own to school, we gave him his own phone.

Giving a 10-year old their own phone results in daily messages like this: (the woman in the picture is supposed to be me.)

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A morning without my phone

On Tuesday, I went into town without my iPhone.  Was this some sort of experiment, you ask?  No, I’m an idiot who dropped my new phone and smashed the glass , so it had to be taken to the shop.

I’m very big on not being attached to technology.  I’m generally quite proud of myself that I turn off my phone each evening about 6pm (I have a home phone if someone needs me).  On the weekends I occasionally forget to turn it on at all and on vacation, it never goes on.  Vacation is a total disconnect.

What I realized Tuesday morning is that during a normal, non-vacation day, I tend to rely on my phone a lot more than I realize.  As I left the house, I thought, “what time does the subway leave?”  But I couldn’t check because I didn’t have a phone.

Then I thought, I wonder what time I’m supposed to pick my son up for choir practice – NO CALENDAR, NO PHONE.

Got to the restaurant to meet a friend and wanted to tell her I was there early – CAN’T MESSAGE.  NO PHONE.

George Clooney and Madonna came riding toward me on a giant moose and I didn’t have a camera because I had – NO PHONE.  (that last one might have just been my imagination)

After lunch I was supposed to meet my husband to get back my phone at 1pm.  But I didn’t know what time it was because I didn’t have a watch and usually use my phone.

My phone is back now, covered in a quilted sort of pad because I can’t be trusted not to drop it again.  I’m so glad to have it back.  I have a really good looking cup of coffee I need to take a picture of.

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Invaders

Something keeps beeping from somewhere in my house. My husband says it’s the new phone he got.  But it’s not coming from the phone.

I’m pretty sure I’m being invaded.

 

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Old-fashioned

A 10 year old girl asked to use my desk phone yesterday.  Here’s how it went:

Girl: How do I dial?
Me: Just dial direct.  You don’t need anything special to get out.
Girl:  (puts receiver down on desk, dials number and stands there)  Now what do I do?
Me:  PUT IT TO YOUR EAR!

Girl picks up phone and begins to talk to her mother:

Girl: Yeah mom…. I KNOW!…. Well, I’m talking on an OLD phone….. Yeah….It has a CORD!

 

English

Conversation I had on the phone today:

Me: Hello, I’m calling about….
Lady: Speak English please.
Me: I AM speaking English. I’m calling about….
Lady: Please can you speak English?
Me: I AM SPEAKING ENGLISH!

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