Tag Archives: subway

Parenting lesson #15 – Why predicting the future is bad

Had a very detailed discussion yesterday on the subway with my son about the dangers of future prediction. As he is too young to have seen the movie “Minority Report,” I had to fill him in on why we shouldn’t predict crimes that haven’t happened. I also had to explain this:

Me: What if you found out that you would be hit by a car March 10?
Son: Then you could stay at home.Me: Then the car is going to crash into your house.
Son: But we live on the third floor.
Me: Then the helicopter carrying the car will have a lose cable and it will fall in your house.
Son: Ah…

Important moments in parenting and teaching in order to stop your future mad scientists from destroying society. Also, you get your own subway section of seats because people think you’re insane.

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Mini Metro is the reason for my downfall

I realize that I haven’t written much on my blog the past week or two. Normally, I’m quite good at updating every day. I blame this lack of blog activity on a little game called Mini Metro.

This is why I can’t start up new games. They’re too addicting. I have to figure out how to get my subways across the Thames with a limited number of tunnels. I also have to figure out how to design a system for Osaka to manage the population boom while using the Shinkasa fast train.

You see my dilemna. I don’t have time for blogging, eating, cleaning, picking up children, etc. I’ve got to get the triangle people to the square and the circle people to the plus sign. Mini Metro needs me!

(Don’t worry if you don’t understand any of this. That means you’re better off and Mini Metro has not yet got its clutches on you.)

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I got teachers to see and sandwiches to eat!

My 10-year old travels by himself on the subway to school each morning along with many other 10+ year olds. I usually walk him to the station each morning to see him off.

At first, I worried that he and the other children would be confused and nervous traveling on the subway alone. But on days like today, when I look around, the children seem to be fitting in just fine. This morning I saw one kid, with his cup of coffee, dashing up the stairs to the platform. Another one of my son’s 10-year old friends was reading the newspaper.

Now I don’t worry about the kids being confused or nervous anymore, I just worry about them turning into little rushed adults. I fully expect to start seeing them with briefcases and talking into phone headsets, “Bill, we’ve gotta move the red stone in Minecraft. I’ll meet you by the swings at 2:30.”

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How to better your life by laziness

People often ask me:

“Do you want fries with that?”

They also ask me how I keep in such good shape (as far as they can tell).

Well, let me share a few secrets with you.

1. Keep your car parked a 10 minute walk away from your home. This helps you to either walk or use the bus, which is much closer while also helping the environment!

2. Don’t keep soda and candy around the house. Keep it all at the grocery store another 10 minutes away (near the car). When faced with wanting a coke or ice cream, I think about the 10 minute walk – sometimes in the snow – and decide I’ll just go to bed instead.

3. Only work a part-time job so you won’t have enough money for a real lunch. Eat from the free work fruit basket.

4. Be too cheap to buy a subway card. Walk everywhere.

If you follow these lazy simple steps, you too can eat less and help the environment!

You’re welcome.

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Anniversary plus a photo tip!

Today is my 15th wedding anniversary!

Here is a lovely picture of us on vacation a couple of years ago in Berlin. Tip for couples traveling…. if you have trouble getting a picture of the two of you together, most subway platforms have many cameras and screens for the drivers so just take a nice photo while waiting!

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Strange moments

Sometimes when I sit on the subway with my headphones blasting music, I hear a mumble of the driver announcing something from the speakers. Everyone looks around and then we continue. By the time I take off my headphones the announcement is over.

It’s these times when I wonder what I missed :

“Ladies and gentlemen. All passengers exiting at the next station will receive pie.”

Or

“Fellow passengers, keep your eye out for Texans. They walk among us.”

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Swedish Television

This is a popular topic of mine.  I don’t often watch regular t.v. and when I do, I remember why I don’t.

Today’s complaint – A new show about the Stockholm subway.

It’s simply a reality show about going on the subway.

I spend 2 hours of each day traveling on the subway listening to headphones and reading a book specifically for the purpose of NOT seeing what goes on in the subway car around me.  I get my share of crazy and angry people every day, live and in person.

I just don’t understand the appeal of a show about the subway where I live.  I think they have an idea that it’s going to be like those airport shows, but it just doesn’t work that way.  The only entertaining aspect of the subway is the drunks, which is quite sad and scary.  I’m happy to not have to see that.   Other than that, there’s nothing!  “Subway’s late due to an earlier delay.”  “Man hopped over turnstile without paying.”

I turned the channel after a 5 minute discussion in the subway break room about whose turn it was to make the coffee.

 

Riding the subway on a Saturday night

I really wouldn’t know anything about the above title.  I’m not insane enough to ride the subway on a Saturday night.

Nap time

I was reading an article in the paper earlier this week about activities on the subway.  Five people were polled regarding what they like to do while riding the subway.  All five answered “Sleep.”

Is that really what they like to do, or what happens?  I started a job last month which is 30 minutes by subway to my house.  Not one day has passed that I have made it home awake.  I simply can’t do it. I’m fairly sure they are pumping something into the air supply of these trains.  Am I the only one blacking out every day?  What if it’s a conspiracy and everyone on the train falls asleep at the same time?!  What are they doing to us in there?!   Someone must find out what is happening!

Or, maybe I should grab a cup of coffee each day before I leave.

Wednesday Morning Subway Ride -or- How Diseases Are Spread

A little re-cap of my Wednesday morning subway ride:

7:31- Trapped in crowded subway tube next to child coughing up a lung. Apparently a side effect from all that coughing is kicking. Picked the wrong day to wear a skirt.

7:40 – Pushed forward after three stops to crowded middle area where I was coughed on once again, pushed and hit on the head by a tall person reaching for the handle.

7:48 – Finally managed to grab a seat after six stops. Woman next to me also began to cough up a lung. What an interesting mix of germs I’ve received this morning! I plan on writing soon about the horrible super flu coughing disease I develop over the weekend.

Jeeves

One of the political parties in Stockholm wants to have butlers in the subway.  My idea when I read the headline was that he would follow each person around, carry their bags, warm up and save a seat, hold open doors when you’re running and have a hot cup of tea waiting when you step in.

However, it seems that their idea is to have someone do your laundry and your grocery shopping for you so you can pick it up at the subway station when you get off of work.  The laundry thing is ridiculous.  Why would people in Stockholm carry their giant laundry bags all the way to the subway, give their dirty underwear to a stranger or PAY to have their laundry done when everyone has free laundry rooms in their apartment buildings?

Oh well.  I guess it’s nice to live in a city where apparently there are no other issues for the political parties to discuss except whether we should have butlers in the subways.

Let’s Go Crazy!

So there I am, sitting in a crowded subway surrounded by surly teenagers, when suddenly out of my pocket a little man from Minneapolis says, “Dearly Beloved, we are gathered here today to get through this thing called life….”

Those touch pads on the iphone don’t seem to work quite fast enough when you are desperately trying to stop your 1984 “Purple Rain” album from rockin’ the whole subway car.

I have no idea why that music started up.  Normally I always have my headphones on even if there is no music playing.   It’s the best way to avoid having to talk to crazy people and drunks.  Unfortunately it doesn’t always work, but it stops about 20 percent of them which is an improvement.

At least it was Prince and not something more embarassing blaring out of my phone, because believe me, I’ve got a lot of strange stuff on there.

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